"You get old and then you die a long, hard, slow death."
It was not like anything I had heard her say before to me. I think that in a lucid moment she just could see the reality of what she was going through all these months.
I sat in the car a good long time, trying to clear the frustration out of my system. I have to be able to see to drive my way back home the two miles to my
house. I started the car and slowly drove out of the long driveway, when something
caught my eye in a sudden motion.
Bounding across the road at least 10 deer running at full gallop.
I was so glad I had stopped for a few minutes and not traveled that
road or something bad could have happened.
2011 came in here with blue skies, green grassy fields and
many thoughts of what the year will bring.
My father died on New Years Day
seventeen years ago.
WE MISS YOU DAD!
15 comments:
Carol I think of you so often and wonder how your doing. Its so hard to have aging parents who are not well. This in and out of the hospital or rehabs is a horribly hard thing on them. However its so hard on us to. I think to that we need to take a few minutes to breathe and release as you did today. Its hard on the caregivers who have to see loved ones suffer daily as well. I am glad you took a few minutes for you though not ever easy, it seems like we need to so we can do what needs doing.
Glad you were a few minutes behind those deer. But what a thing to see!! Thinking of you and keeping Mom and you both in prayer.
Sis, I feel so bad for your mom and I know the pain you are going through. The caregiver has a hard job and we have to keep the tears hidden. You and your mom are in my prayers always.
Hugs,
Beth
Such a moving post, Carol Dee. Hugs to you.
Sorry your heart is heavy.I hit a deer just before Thanksgivingon my way to church. It was a young buck. It was a miracle I didn't wreck and mess up my car, but I didn't!
I know what you mean about your dad's death. My daddy went to the hospital via the emergency room on New Year's Day 2003. He died 6 weeks later, still in the hospital. He never came home. Eight LONG years ago,but I still miss him so much.
HUGS!~~~`Jackie~~~~
Hi Carol, I'm sorry for the tough time you are going through with your Mom. Now that both of my parents have passed on, it's seems very strange around the holidays, and I miss them both. I'm glad you didn't hit the deer. I had a close call like that before too one time when I was driving near the coast. I hope your week starts out better tomorrow.
Gerry
I thought of you today when I went to cry into a towel so hubby wouldn't hear. I think of the movie steel magnolias and want to wack Weaser to git it all out. Ennaway my dear friend it is not easy and life seems not so easy when we get older and health problems. You are so strong and such a great care giver. I am glad you take time to vent and take time for yourself. I know that is hard to do. You and your Mom are in my prayers. Big hugs to you.
This is EXACTly what I am going through with my parents now. My dad said to me he never EVER thought he would end up like this in all his imaginings of the end. My response to him was that I expect to be completely alone with no one to take care of me...(which is true)
He responded by thanking me.
Carol your blog today reminds me of just how precious time really is. My mother is 78 and she's slowly loosing her memory. A yr ago she would forget from one week to the next, now it's from one minute. When we're little we think our parents are invincible and will live forever. I now know her time here with us mentally and physically is precious and we should savor every moment. Thank you for sharing your day with us. ((hugs))
One of the first things that came into my mind New Year's Eve day, was that my father passed away that day, so many years ago. I tried to call my Mom, but I think she went to visit Jon. Perhaps 2011 will be a time for joy, even though it may not seem so joyous now. My thoughts are constantly with you and your Mom. I'm sure your Dad is proud of how you've helped your Mom over the years. Happy New Year!
Carol, I know what you're going through and I know how hard it is. We do try to keep a happy face on for them when inside we are falling apart. My mom use to say "It's hell getting old" and she got to the point where she was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm so sorry your mom is having such a hard time right now and I pray everyday for her that she recovers soon. Hugs and Love hun.
I am like Sherry, and all the others here. I am always thinking of you Carol, and of your mom as well. You're never far from my mind.
We can't be there with you but we ARE here for you. Always.
((((HUGS))))
May 2011 bring you peace.
I think of you and your mom often and feel so for what your going through. I know who hard it is. God Bless you both.
Im keeping you in my Prayers for the extra strength when you need it and for your Mom to have some peace when she needs it the most.
Take care of you also. You have to be drained.
What your going thought is Im sure the hardest thing you have faced.
Gods Blessing on you , your house and on your Mom.
and Im lost for words. I just know to watch while someone we love so much suffer in silence is the hardest to endure and drains us until there is or can be nothing left.
Thinking about you.
Hugs and Many from me to you
The Deer are beautiful and God blessed you with these. They Im sure took your mind off of every thing.
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